the “Happy Birthday!” feature on Facebook makes me feel funny. it’s one of my 600+ friends’ birthdays almost everyday, and then of course once a year it’s my birthday. yesterday was that day. I could not resist peeking periodically throughout the day to see who posted— the close loved ones called & visited of course, but I couldn’t help but to take notice as to who of my 600+ “friends” wished to wish me well on my 25th.

it’s definitely silly, but i had a sneaking self consciousness concerning my turnout; unsettled thinking, “is this how many people like me?” just 50 of them— several my family, a few neighbors, and a few stragglers from my high school French class. what about everyone else? does it matter? and the answer has to be no. I can’t let the insincerity of a “Happy Birthday! hope all is well!” on my Facebook wall hold any weight in the way I feel on my day. Facebook is a popularity contest anyway, and it doesn’t affect me any other day of the year; my birthday cannot and will not an should not be any different. I have consciously opted to not wish Facebook acquaintances a happy birthday more often than not these days. although I can think of several folks who I expected tidings from, I can’t think more about it. those most important made themselves known, and that’s what matters. screw you Facebook for not wishing me a happy birthday this year either though.